Mandioca

You: hello
Stranger: hey
You: I'm Michael
Stranger: i've been getting some mad requests on this site
You: I'm from Portugal and im looking for friends
You: like....what?
Stranger: it's very interesting...
You: rimjobs?
Stranger: 'i just want to know your name - tell me and say goodbye'
You: that's pretty standard in this site
Stranger: 'what is you favourite muscle in the human body?'
You: ahaha lol
Stranger: it's cool
You: so funny
Stranger: the muscle one was genuine too, not like a stupid joke
You: "I like dogs...will u be mine?"
You: that kind?
Stranger: =(
You: I hate women...thats why I fuck'em so hard
Stranger: there's not as much of that stuff as i thought there would be
You: are you a girl?
Stranger: no, do i write like one?
You: my dog's cool
You: no
You: my dog is called Mandioca
Stranger: why is it cool?
You: cuz he is awesome
You: and he does tricks
Stranger: lol
You: sometimes he brings me my slippers
Stranger: that's amazing!
You: one time i laughed so hard i farted
Stranger: lol
Stranger: that made me laugh pretty hard...
You: I'm disgusting
You: forgive me
You: but my dog really is the center of my life
You: Man-Di-Oca
You: beautiful name
Stranger: yeah, it is
Stranger: cool
You: one time he made me dinner
Stranger: was it nice?
You: it was nice
You: maybe he's the reason why I don't have a gf
You: he's jealous
You: he barks at them and enters when im having sexual intercourse
Stranger: 'he barks at them when im having sexual intercourse'
You: yes he does
You: he's so silly
Stranger: lol
You: are you silly?
You: will you be my dog?
Stranger: I'VE BEEN ASKED THAT BEFORE TOO
Stranger: what is with this site?
You: do you like my dog?
You: he sure likes you
Stranger: 2795 people, and they all want to know the same things.
You: he wants to know you
You: ok.
You: you don't wanna be my dog
You: will you be my bitch?
Stranger: hang on.
Stranger: no sorry, it was you who asked me the dog thing
You: yes I was
Stranger: but it was in quotes, not a direct question.
Stranger: phew.
You: yeah
You: im not craaaaaaazy
Stranger: well
You: I just like my dog
You: very much
You: Mandioca
You: just say it
You: please
Stranger: do I have to say?
You: YES
Stranger: LOL
You: will you?
Stranger: stop it!!
You: Man...
You: Di
You: Oca
Stranger: I hate your dog so much now!
You: are you enjoying this conversation?
You: I am, I think we are friends now
You: when can I go to your place?
Stranger: you remind me of...
You: what's your name, please?
Stranger: damn, I can't remember the name.
You: I like Jay Leno
Stranger: stop asking questions which match up to what i'm saying which is unrelated to the question that you're asking!
You: I used to watch it...when I had a long beard
You: sorry
You: forgive me
You: don't make me cry please
Stranger: okay cool
You: the last time I cried, Mandioca slapped me
Stranger: count to five
You: 5 what?
Stranger: and then we both say our favourite thing, okay?
Stranger: like this...
Stranger: 1
Stranger: 2
Stranger: 3
Stranger: 4
You: my dog

French Girl

Stranger: Hi
You: i'm eating sugar
Stranger: okay lol
You: you are from?
Stranger: florida
You: cool, France
Stranger: that's cool
Stranger: m/f
You: f
You: you?
Stranger: m
You: so you're a dude
Stranger: age?
Stranger: yeah
You: 17
Stranger: 18
You: i like apples
Stranger: i like apples too
You: apple me up! that's what i say to my bf
Stranger: hahahah
You: but i don't like him
You: he cheats one me
Stranger: then why is he your bf?
You: cuz he loves me
You: very much
Stranger: but he cheats on u?
You: at least it's what he says
You: who doesn't cheat nowadays?
Stranger: have u cheated on him?
You: no
You: never
You: but he deserves to do it
You: he's very handsome
Stranger: then cheat on him
You: im just a regular French Girl....who would want me?
Stranger: what do u look like?
You: dunno
You: pretty normal I guess
Stranger: like black hair?
You: some people say i should be a model
You: im blonde
Stranger: well u must be pretty
You: no.
Stranger: i love blondes
You: I dunno how to dress
You: hey...arr you coming on to me?
Stranger: girl, we're like 10000 miles apart
You: oh that's cool
You: you're probably ugly anyway
Stranger: lol i think i'm ugly
You: I was kidding
You: u must look like...George Clooney
Stranger: yeah.....
You: really?
Stranger: no....
Stranger: i'm dirty blonde blue eyes 5'10
You: cool
You: what do you do in life?
You: besides masturbation?
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: im a draftsman
Stranger: so what do u do?
Stranger: besides your bf
You: you are very funny
You: like Seinfeld
You: better than Seinfeld
Stranger: are u coming on to me?
You: i'm an actress
Stranger: that's cool
You: dude, we're 10000000 km apart
You: but I can't get a job
Stranger: yet we're still talking to each other
You: i auditioned to a role of a maid...in a show called "We Are All Stupid"
Stranger: lol
You: is very funny
Stranger: were u too smart for the part?
You: but i didnt get the part
You: maybe!
Stranger: heheh
You: they just hired a girl with more boobs
You: i hate boobs
Stranger: so u don't got boobs ?
You: yes
You: but not big
Stranger: B's?
You: C plus
Stranger: those are pretty big
You: to me are very small
You: I like carrots
You: not only bunnies like carrots
Stranger: big carrots or small carrots?
You: I like them
You: are you being dirty?
Stranger: maybe
You: what do you mean by that?
You: you sir, disgust me!
Stranger: lol

Beauty

You: heeey
Stranger: hey
You: are you beautiful?
You: i'm not
Stranger: what kind of question is that? lol
Stranger: if someone is so full of themself that they say they are good looking would you want to talk to them?
You: I just want to know what do you think of yourself
You: you can find yourself attractive...
You: and not be arrogant
You: don't you think?
Stranger: sometimes, but that's like 2% of all people who think they are attractive
You: yeah
You: so maybe...all the good people are ugly
Stranger: nah
You: beauty.....such a strange thing